Local Bacteria Credited With Saving Humanity

As in the novel, the Martian invaders who landed in tonight's broadcast were defeated not by the Army but by ordinary Earth germs, to which they had no immunity. In H.G. Wells's 1898 original the bacteria get the last word, and in tonight's radio version they did too.

Bacteria leaders declined a ticker-tape parade, citing their size. 'We were just doing what we always do,' said a spokesgerm. Health officials ask the public to keep washing their hands anyway, and remind listeners the whole thing was a radio play.

Satire. For what actually happened, see the “What really happened” box in the full issue.

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