Most Read · Friday, October 31, 1941
Jefferson Reportedly Moved Once, Still Bitter
Thomas Jefferson's face was first started on Washington's right. When the granite there turned out to be cracked and unworkable, crews dynamited it off the mountain in 1934 and began again on Washington's left.
Sources close to the mountain say Jefferson has not let it go. 'I was there first,' he is said to have told nobody, being granite. Washington, for his part, says he never asked for the move. Lincoln and Roosevelt are staying out of it. Visitors are asked not to bring it up.
Satire. For what actually happened, see the “What really happened” box in the full issue.